Wednesday, September 20, 2006

Gossip About Non Famous People That You Don't Know

I heard that Ted has hair plugs. If so, I think they look good.

Caroline is cheating on David with his sister. Her parents are sending her to one of those Christian reprogramming camps for gay people.

Alex lied to the cops about being high on glue when he wrecked his dad's SUV. He was sniffing Sharpies.

Nell got fired two months ago and has been pretending to go to work ever since.

Joelle is pregnant.


Anonymous said...

And did you hear about Jill? Oh... My... God!

Louisiana said...

come on who doesn't have hair plugs these days? Caroline is keeping it in the family at least. And no camp is going to help her play for the other team..i know, their was a movie about this, i just can't think of the name..Sharpies are a quality product, Alex obviously chooses the best. Nell is working hard keeping the act. Acting is a formidable and often fruitable profession. Joelle has about 4 months to tell or baby will tell on her.

Anonymous said...

Hi Mr. Kyle,

This is my first time here. I read your Crate and Barrel piece in McSweeney's, loved it, googled your name... and here I am. I just had to comment and tell you that I'm blown away by your talent. You are an amazing writer! Some of your writing made me laugh so hard, my boss actually came over to my desk to ask if everything's ok. Other posts moved me to tears, esp. "How To Be Happy" and "Accident Prone". Do you know that feeling of discovering a writer that is able to articulate your innermost feelings, but does it in such an original, imaginative way that it actually gives you fresh insight into your own life?
Well that is what I felt reading those two pieces. I think that's the highest praise I can give a writer, or any artist for that matter.
So... thank you for that.

Unknown said...


Incredibly humbled by your comments. They are very much appreciated. Really.

Rest of you,

Only comments like Daphne's will be accepted from now on. Study up and execute.